Snogging to the Stars and Back Again
by Tarts Wardrobe
Summary: Set after LIAMTT. Georgia Nicolson is once again on the rack of lurveee. Who will she choose? Dave the Laugh, the Italian Stallion, or the Sex God? Rated T just to be safe. R&R pleasee! Chapter 9&10 up! COMPLETED
1. A Note from Georgia

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Georgia, or her groovy pallies, and those marvy sex&love gods, or the fabbity fab Dave the L.  
I do wish I owned Dave though... What a travesty...

**

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A Note from Georgia**

Hello my international Groovesters!

Here is my latest diary straight from my little home in Billy Shakespeare Country (for the dim-witted, I'm speaking of England). Sorry it has taken me a million and seven years to get this to you, but it is vair, vair tiring being a sex-kitty as well as a snogging sensation.

I can tell you are getting miffed and wish to carry on, with this diary-extraordinaire!

So au revoir! And infinite kisses, in a non-lesbian sort of way…

Love,

Georgia xxx


	2. Bus Ride of Freedom

**Disclaimer:** Blah, blah and thrice Blah! I only own this plot!

**Saturday July 30****th**

**11:47 pm**

Back in the tent, cosily tucked into my sleeping bag. How I even managed to get back in here, in the dark of night, without causing myself any harm, well that is le mystery!

A larger mystery is, how in the name of our Lord Sandra did I end up snogging Dave the Laugh?! Dave the Laugh is my mate! Dave the Mate! That's it! Dave the Mate.

**11:52 pm**

Dave the nip libbler.

Shut up brain! Shut up, shut up!

**Three minutes later**

Rosie is having some sort of rolling fit in her sleep. I may have to duff her up a bit.

**11:57 pm**

A pillow to her head caused her to seize any more abrupt movements. Must get some beauty sleep. Zzzzzzzz…

**Sunday July 31****st**

**Morning**

Woke up at the crack of seven-thirty am to the sound of Herr Kamyer banging some pots together I peeked out the flap and Miss Wilson was emerging from her tent in her nightie! Oh dear Gott in Himmel, how will I ever get that image out of my young and innocent mind?!

Jools and Rosie had awoken from the clatter, too. Rosie's beard was stuck to Jools' forehead, giving her the look of a very tragic unibrow. We crawled out of the tent flap. A few girls had begun to destroy their tents.

Yes, yes and thrice YES!! Back to civilization! Hurray! Three cheers for Merry England!

**Five minutes later**

We cannot take our tent down. It is vair, vair difficult.

**One minute later**

Rosie flung herself on top of the tent. She sort of bounced back up, than stumbled backwards.

Jazzy Spazzy came around and managed to take it down.

"Honestly, how can you not be able to take down a tent?"

I said, "I'm sorry Jas, but unlike you, I do not spend every minute of my free time camping with Hunky."

She turned a bit pink in the face and walked away. Some best-pally!

**Waiting for the bus**

**8:23 am**

Sitting on some large rocks. The bus was supposed to pick us up twenty-three minutes ago, but the driver got lost. This is understandable as we are in the middle of absolutely no where.

Jas nearly wet her knickers when Miss Wilson told us the horrible news.

She said "Now we've got even more time to search for more great-crested newts!"

I felt like shouting at her, but best-pallies do not do that. So I crossed my legs on top of the rock and sat quite silently. I imagined myself looking like some sort of Goddess. The sun was shining down on me; I tilted my chin up and closed my eyes. I felt very attractive.

"Gee? What on earth are you doing? Have you gone funny in the head? You look absolutely ridiculous!"

I opened my eyes to find Jas and the rest of the gang staring at me. Than, like clockwork, the good o'l bussy pulled up.

I stood up quite quickly, forgetting my legs were crossed and fell. I got up in a dignity at all times, sort of way.

"The bus to freedom!" I shouted. Hurray! Hurray and thrice HURRAY!

**On the Bus to Freedom**

**9:00 am**

Sitting with Ro-Ro. She is quite mad, to be honest. She's got her beard on and is stroking it.

"What did Dave the Laugh want last night?" She said.

Oh dear Gott in Himmel! I had forgotten about the Snogging-fandango.

I said "Erm… Well, you see…" I was turning Ellen. Hopefully she wont be upset if I replace her as the Dithering Queen.

I think she'd be more upset to find out mine and Dave's snog session. Shut up brain! Shut up!!

"Gee?" Rosie was sounding a bit serious. Quite frightening coming from her. "What happened?"

**9:15 am**

I told her. I told her all about my red-bottomosity. She nodded, which normally would've made any other person look wise. But Rosie had a beard on.

"I thought you were eschewing your red-bottomosity with a firm hand?"

I said "Yes, well that didn't work out."

She continued nodding, like some sort of nodding nod thing. With a beard.

**10:00 am**

Will this bus ride ever end? We've been driving for about a zillion years. Jas is sitting in front of Miss. Wilson, talking about her and Hunky's rambles.

Good grief.

**Eight minutes later**

Nauseating P. Green fell asleep, and some girls drew all over her face with some eyeliner. Quite tragic.

**10:20 am**

Beginning to see some familiar scenery! We're almost homeeee! Yippee!

**Stalag 14**

**10:45 am**

Herr Kamyer hurt his back lifting our luggage off the bus. Poor bloke.

**Walking home**

**10:52 am**

Rosie accidentally mentioned the Dave the Laugh scenario as we walked away from the fiery pit of hell (ie Stalag 14).

Jas looked very furious. She went all pink in the face and got all huffy.

She said, well actually shouted "Georgia Nicolson! You shameless vixen! How could you? To Massimo?!"

Rosie looked at me apologetically.

**At home**

**11:00 am**

It is nice to know nothing has changed. Mutti and Vati did not even notice I have arrived back home. They were sitting on the couch, snogging.

Erlack a pongoes!

"**My" Bedroom  
11:03 am**

It's nice to be back at home. Well, not really. But is definitely beats being in the middle of nowhere in a tent. The phone rang, while I was looking through Mutti's latest Cosmo magazine.

It kept ringing. I got up and shouted "I guess I will just answer the telephone. Even though I am absolutely exhausted from my weekend in the wilderness. Even though my dear, loving Mutti and Vati are doing absolutely nothing…"

Mutti shouted "Thanks Gee!"

The things I do for my so-called family…

I picked up the phone.

"Centre for the Mad, how may I help you?"

"Georgia?"

Blimey O'Reilley's overly large pantaloons! It was Dave the Laugh!!

**11:10 am**

Dave is meeting me at the park in twenty minutes. Which means, very limited time to achieve full sex-kittenosity. I suppose I will go for the au naturelle look.

**11:27 am **

Foundation, eyeliner, mascara, lippy, blush and eye shadow applied. I look quite marvy, if I do say so myself.

**11:30 am**

Out the front door. On my way to the park. It's a lovely day to hang out with your mates, which is exactly what I am doing. I am hanging out with Dave, my mate.

**In my bedroom**

**1:22 pm**

What on in the name of our Lord Sandra have I gotten myself into?! I am a shameless vixen with a bright red bottom! And my hand is anything but firm! It is limper than a limp thing at a limp party!

I was casually sitting on the park bench waiting for Dave.

"Hello Gorgeous!" He said, from behind me.

I turned around. He really is quite groovy looking. In a matey-type of way. "Why hello, Dave".

He looked full of confusionosity at my formality. "I wanted to talk about last night…"

Oh damn.

I said, "Well, what do you mean? We were just hanging about, like two hanging things…"

"I meant what I said, Gee" He grabbed my hands quite quickly. I got a bit frightened and pulled them away. He took them again, much less speedy and said, "I love you."

I was a bit shocked. At one point, my mouth drooped open a bit.

"What? Why the hell are you staring at me like that? Can't get enough of my stunning good looks?" He laughed.

At this point I realized I must look like some sort of fish-type creature and shut my mouth.

He looked back at me, "Well sexy-kitty," He said "Now that you know how I truly feel about you, I guess I shall head off than…"

That's when it happened! That is when I put my lips onto his, and we snogged for all of England!!

After our snog fest (4, 5 and 6!), I told Dave I had to go and shine a pair of my shoes. He looked at me like I was bonkers, than kissed my cheek.

As I began walking off, I heard him call out "So, it's done with the Italian Stallion, than?"

I didn't respond. I didn't know the answer.

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**Mobiles give you cancer: Well, there it is! Don't forget to review & add to your alerts list! Updating soon! **


	3. Whelk Fish

**Disclaimer: **For the six million and thirty first time, I do not own Gee or her marvy pallies. I do, however own this fabbity fab plot.

**In my Bedroom**

**2:36 pm**

I am in a horrendous state. Jas has come around to discuss the shenanigans that have unfolded today (i.e. Dave the Laugh situation).

I told her "My red-bottom is the reddest it has ever been. I have been a very horrible person. I deserve a duffing up."

"I am not going to cause you any harm, Gee. Tell me exactly what happened."

**2:52 pm**

I told her exactamondo what exactly happened. She tutted and shook her head and did that fiddly thing with her fringe.

She simply said "Cheating on your Italian boyfriend. Tsk, tsk."

I simply hit her with a pillow.

**All aloney, on my owny**

**4:00 pm**

Sent Jas home. She was no help at all. I am starting to consider becoming a full time Lesbian. I can get some pointers from Miss. Stamp.

**4:03 pm**

We can go to Lezzie bars together. And start a t-shirt company.

**Monday August 1st**

**Kitchen**

**9:43 am**

Libby came thundering into my room this morning, with porridge all over her face, begging for a kiss. I managed to dodge her, but she rubbed her slimy, porridgey face all over my pillow.

**9:45 am**

Angus just walked into the kitchen. Covered in porridge. I told Libby to clean him off.

She said, "But he lobes it!"

I think she may actually be right. He's purring.

**10:37 am**

Phoned Jas.

I said, "Jas"

She said "What?"

"I'VE ONLY BEEN ON THE PHONE WITH YOU FOR TWO AND A HALF SECONDS AND YOU'RE ALREADY ANNOYING ME!"

Than I hung up, if she is my bestie, she'll call me back, full of apologiosity.

**10:41 am**

She did not call back.

**11:30 am**

Meeting the Ace Gang at the pictures, in one hour. My former best pally who's name I shall not speak (Jas) is bringing along her lover (Tom). This can only mean one thing. Or maybe two things, I don't really know, or care. But the nub of it is that Dave the Laugh may be there.

**11:32 am**

Must achieve full glamourosity and look incredibly groovy grapes.

**11:36 am**

Jeans or skirt?

Jeans says casualosity.

Skirt may look a bit keen.

Jeans it is.

**12:24 pm**

Meeting up with the gang. I've gone with my denim skirt and a white tank top. Major accessories and sexy makeup applied, for a simple sort of look.

**Rosie's House**

**6:13 pm**

Back from the pictures. Dave and I sat together. There was a bit, err… a lot of snogging about. At one point, I caught sight of an evil glare from Jas. She is really quite evil.

Anyways, we all decided to go back to Ro Ro's house, as her Mutti and Vati are full of maturosity and have left for the night. I have said it before, and I will say it again, why can't my parental figures be normal?

**6:23 pm**

Sven ordered a pizza, and there is some sort of slimy topping on it.

**6:24 pm**

Blimey O'Reilley! I think its whelk fish! ERLACK!!

**7:00 pm**

Playing truth or dare. Brings back the legume stuffed pants incident, many moons ago.

**7:01 pm**

Dared Jas to do it again.

**7:04 pm**

Miss huffy knickers is tres upsetted by me. I think legume stuffed pantaloons gives Tom the mega horn.

**7:11 pm**

Sven was dared to number five kiss Rollo. Rosie didn't mind.

Oh crap it's my turn.

I picked truth, Jas asked if Dave the laugh gave me the mega horn. I believe I turned a bright shade of red, and muttered something about my mother going into labour, and that I had to leave instantly.

**Sitting on Rosie's front lawn**

**7:16 pm**

Another smooth getaway for Georgia Nicolson.

**7:17 pm**

Bloody hell. Someone's coming outside. Must crawl into a bush.

**7:21 pm**

The bush I have crawled into happens to be a quite thorny rosebush. Ouch.

I'm peeking through a shrubbery gap. It's Dave.

He called out, "Sex Kitty?"

Full of stupidosity, I say "I'm not here"

It takes me a minute or two, to realize I have just giving away my top-secret hiding location.

He says, "Why are you in a rosebush?"

I say, with as much pride I can muster "I have accidentally fallen into this bit of shrubbery, whilst rushing home to my dear Mutti, who is currently giving birth to my new sister or new brother."

I stumbled out of the bush and looked at Dave. Ooer! He really is quite groovy!

"I bid you adieu,"

**In my bedroom**

**9:15 pm**

My lips are very bad lips! I would scowl at them, if I didn't need them to scowl.

Just as I was leaving Dave, my lips puckered up for some snogging. He realized my lips were puckering up, like some sort of puckering pucker-upper. He came closer to me, and than we began snogging to the stars and back again.

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**Mobiles give you cancer:** Another chappie come and gone. Hopefully you enjoyed it, even though it was tres short. I'm just saving some grooviness for the upcoming chapters! So please reviewwww & add to your alert list. YOU DIGG ?


	4. Dave the Laugh's Lonely Hearts Club Band

**Disclaimer:** Oh dear Gott in Himmel. I only own this plot, not much else.

**Tuesday August 2****nd**

**In bed**

**8:00 am**

Woke up at the crack of seven-fifty eight. Gordy, my beloved cross-eyed cat was lying atop of my nunga-nungas, making it a bit difficult to breathe, which is essential for life.

**Kitchen**

**8:07 am**

Vati looked surprised to see me awake.

He said, "Why are you awake?"

Honestly, I get the impression that I am unwanted in my home! Amongst my own flesh and blood!

**Bedroom**

**Two minutes later**

Brought up a strawberry poptart (for vitamin C) and some chocolate milk. Libby and I are having a sort of picnic on my bed.

**12:18 pm**

The telephone is ringing, so naturally I have to answer it.

**Ten groovy minutes later**

Oh my Giddy Gods trousers! It was my yummy scrumboes Italian boyfriend Massimo!

His voice is incredibly sexy and very groovy.

He asked about me visiting Italy. I told him that Mutti and Vati were being vair, vair difficult, and I will continue trying to persuade them.

I am no longer on the rack of love. Massimo is my one and only. I am going around Dave's house, to tell him our snogging sessions are finito and that I am truly and madly in lurve with the Italian Stallion.

**12:29 pm**

Yes, I'm off to go do exactly that.

**12:30 pm**

What to wear?

**Outside Dave's house**

**1:26 pm**

Have decided on my new jeans and my Mutti's new glittery tank top.

**1:27 pm**

Okay, here I go. About to knock on Dave's front door.

**1:29 pm**

I'm beginning to wonder whether or not this is a good idea.

**1:46 pm**

Dave' Mutti came outside.

She said, "Are you looking for Dave?"

I nodded. I don't think I looked vair full of intelligosity.

"Okay, come on in"

Dave's Mutti, whose name is Gloria, led me up to Dave's room.

WOWOWOW! She is actually leaving me alone with him. My Mutti and Vati would die before allowing a boy in my room.

I knocked on Dave's bedroom door.

I heard him say, "Come in!"

So I went in.

**On the park bench**

**2:30 pm**

Dave's bedroom was vair quite groovy and tres interesting. He had plenty of posters on the walls. Mainly of that band, that sings that song, Sergeant Peppers, or something odd like that. His room was also just as messy as mine, which I enjoyed, as it made me feel like less of a slob.

He turned away from his computer, "Sex-kitty! What're you doing here?"

Ooh! He looked vair irresistible. Like he had just woken up. Vair, vair attractive.

I said, "Well, Dave, you see…"

He looked at me, waiting for me to continue. Ooer! He is just so groovy!

He broke the awkward silence, "Speechless from my beauty, sex-kitty?"

I nodded like some speechless nodding nod thing. At this point, I could feel my naughty lips beginning to pucker.

Luckily, before my naughty lips could get me into another snogging fiasco, Dave's Mutti shouted out, asking if I'd like a beverage. This is quite nice, as my Mutti would never do such a thing.

Gloria brought us up some tea, and a plate of biscuits. What a lovely lady. My mother could really learn a thing, or five from her.

After Gloria left us, Dave began inching closer to me, and began singing that Sergeant Peppers song. It was quite nice, as I was getting the ultra-mega-giganticus maximus horn.

Eschewing my bright red bottom, with a vair, vair thrice vair firm hand, I told Dave I must depart. I kissed him on the cheek and left.

I have excellent self-control.

**Watching the tube**

**6:27 pm**

Rosie rang. She told me that this Friday we're all going dancing. I am tres excited! I better start doing facial masks!

**Bathroom**

**6:29 pm**

Applying an avocado facial mask.

**6:32 pm**

Oh dear Gott in Himmel! I have gotten some avocado in my eye! Sacre bleu! I am beginning to cry.

**7:00 pm**

Avocado mask washed off. Went downstairs to persuade Mutti to allow me to go to Pizza-a-gogo land to visit my gorgy Italian cakey.

I said, "Mutti, when will you and Vati be purchasing my tickets?"

She said, "What tickets?"

I got all exasperated, "The tickets to Italy! I was thinking that next week would be a good time to leave…"

Very sternly, Mutti said, "Georgia. For the thousandth time, you are not going to Italy!"

I told her, "Mutti, for the thousandth time, I am going to stay with Massimo's family, and I would greatly appreciate if you would go online and book a flight, while I go to pack."

"You are not going to Italy. That is my final word."

Honestly, Mutti can be so difficult. I will try again when she is in a better mood.

**7:10 pm**

Off to go and ask Mutti again. I went into her bedroom, she was searching her closet.

She said, "Georgia, did you take my new glittery tank top?" She sounded quite angry. Now is not a good time to ask her about Italy. Or tell her I got some Avocado on her shirt.

**In bed**

**11:57 pm**

Cannot wait for dancing extravaganza Friday night! Three cheers and one fist pump!

I must now get my beauty sleep, now. Zzzz…

**Thursday, August 4****th**

**6:45 pm**

Lost my diary, and just found it now. Libby had brought it up to the airing cupboard, and hid it under one of Mutti's old bras. I may have to boil my diary now.

**6:57 pm**

Just rang up Jas.

I said, "Jas"

She said "What?"

I didn't yell at her, because she is my best pally, and I need a favour from her.

"Sweet, Jas. My best pally," I said

She said, "What?"

It is vair difficult being nice to her, while she is being an annoying fringe flicker.

"Tomorrow night, after the dance, I am sleeping over at your house. Alright?"

"Why?"

Grrr! She is a pain in my bumoley!

"Because my Mutti and Vati will be very upset if I'm not home until the wee hours of the morning."

She huffed.

"Jas?"

"What?"

Keep calm. Ohmmm…

"May I stay over tomorrow night?"

She said, "Fine. But please bring me three Jammy Dodgers."

Oh how I love my best pally!

**Friday, August 5****th**

**7:00 am**

Woke up at six-thirty to begin my beautiosity ritual.

**In front of the mirror**

**7:06 am**

Searching for lurking lurkers. As I am going out tonight, there is bound to be one surfacing.

**7:08 am**

Found one! It's not very large, and it's on my forehead. My fringe can cover it.

I better look for any sightings of the orangutan gene. My eyebrows look a bit shapeless, and quite ungroovy. I suppose I'll tweeze a few hairs, here and there.

**7:11 am**

Everything seems to be going well today, I'm a bit worried.

**7:30 am**

Applied a mashed banana face mask. Going downstairs for brekky.

**Kitchen**

**7:34 am**

Vati asked what in Gods name was all over my face.

I said, "Vati, it is a banana facial mask. Because, I, unlike you, care about my appearance."

He walked off, muttering something about no respect.

**Three minutes later**

I have burnt my toast; it tastes a bit like merde.

**1:36 pm**

Phoned Rosie, asking about tonight's plan.

I said, "Rosie, what is tonight's plan?"

She said, "We are meeting up at the clock tower, than walking to that new dance club. Sven says he bought himself a new silver light-up suit, and one for me as well."

She is quite mad.

Than, in a very crap French accent, she said "I am, 'ow you zay, very excited!"

In my very marvy French accent I said, "Oui, Madame. I am very excited az well. Vat time shall ve meet up?"

"Ah, ja! Seven-virty, I vink."

I said, "Okay, zee you there."

As I was about to hang up, Rosie said "VAIT!" in a very loud voice, that I may have gone deaf. But most likely not, as I heard what she was saying.

She was saying, "Let us do a quick round of the Viking Bison Horn dance."

After dancing like mad and the triumphant shout of "HORRRRNNNNN!" I hung up.

**2:00 pm**

What to wear, what to wear…

**2:45 pm**

I've decided on my black leather skirt, and my black halter top, and my black ankle boots. I'll look quite sophis. in my all black outfit.

**2:48 pm**

Perhaps I can sneak Mutti's black Coach wristlet from her closet…

**3:59 pm**

Now, to select my makeup…

**4:20 pm**

I've decided on the maturosity look. This includes lots of black eyeliner, and plenty of black mascara.

**4:22 pm**

Contemplating whether or not to wear my boy entrancers.

**4:27 pm**

Have decided against the boy entrancers.

**7:16 pm**

Mutti and Vati and Libs have gone out to the pictures. I told Mutti I will be sleeping over at Jas' and returning tomorrow at noon.

HEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!!

I am tres excited, with a side of PANTS!

**7:27 pm**

I look quite marvy. Very sophis. No boy will be able to resist my sex-kittyosity. But, no boy can have me, as I am the girlfriend of Dave the Laugh.

**7:28 pm**

I mean, Massimo. I am the girlfriend of Massimo.  


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**Mobiles give you cancer:** I can promise you ultra-grooviness, possibly a bit of tragedosity in the next chapter, or two. But I need some reviews! So get on that, pretty pleaseeeeee :D


	5. Some Sort of Snogging Emporium

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the charries, only this sad excuse for a plot. Hopefully this chapter doesnt suck to much!

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**Walking  
7:32 pm**

HEEHEEHEEHEE!

Tonight should be vair groovy! All groovin' and jammin' and all those mega marvy things I can possibly think of!

**7:36 pm**

It's a tad difficult walking in my boots. Oh well. Beautiosity before comfortosity, is what I always say!

I can see lights just yonder!

**Two minutes later**

Oh dear Gott in Himmel! It's Ro-Ro and Sven's light up outfits!

Jassy Spazzy's bed

**2:23 am**

Sitting all teary eyed in Jas' bed. Sweet little Jassy is all tucked up asleep, with her whole gang of stuffed owls.

When I reached the clock tower, the whole gang was there. We were just waiting for a few of Tom and Sven's mates. Three million and sixty four years later, they arrived.

Dave the Laugh looked vair, vair and thrice vair groovy. I thanked the high Heavens above me it was semi-dark out, or else my big red flashing bottom would've been exposed like two exposing exposed things at an exposing convention.

He said "Hello, Sex Kitty. Ready for a night you won't soon forget?"

I felt Jas' evil eyes glaring at me.

I politely said, "Hello David, and yes I am quite ready, thank you"

He looked a bit confuddled, but we walked on anyways.

**2:26 pm**

As we walked to the club, we all linked arms, like a chain. It was quite funny, a dozen kiddies just linking arms, strolling through the night. A few cars drove by, and looked at us like we were loons, (The people in the car looked at us, not the car itself).

Before going into the club, the Ace Gang did a quick round of the Viking Bison Horn dance.

The club was quite the groovy place. There was a great big disco ball, and all these flashing lights and loud music.

The girls went into the loo's to freshen up. Sven carried Rosie in, sat her down on the counter and left. He really is quite bonkers.

We went to go find the lads and get our grooves on.

"Here Kitty, kitty…"

I turned around to see Dave the Laugh smiling that naughty smile of his.

He said "Come dance with me!"

I looked around. Sven was coming my way, with both Rosie and Mabs in his arms. Frightened for my life, I agreed.

Dave is really quite the groovy dancer. He goes a bit mad on the dance floor, like Angus just after Mutti washes the floor (which is hardly ever). But, anyways, I could feel myself getting all sweaty and warm, it was pretty full in here. Sweating tartish girls were rubbing their wet arms against me. Erlack!!

Dave and I went to go sit down on a couch.

He looked at me and said "Remember the camping trip? That was good fun, wasn't it?"

"Well, Dave" I said, "I'm not very keen on spending time in the great outdoors. I would've much preferred-"

And that's when he snogged me! As if the couch was some sort of snogging emporium! So, I did all I could possibly do!

With great force, I shoved him off of me. He sort of fell on the floor and yelped with pain. WOOPS!!

Everyone crowded around and asked what I did to Dave.

They said, "Georgia! What in the fresh hell have you done to Dave?!"

With as much pride as I could muster, I said "I gave him a good

Shove off the couch." And with that, I walked off with as my dignity as I had left. Which wasn't much.

I was going to go wait outside until the gang was through with their trivial dancing business, but it was much too nippy noodles. So I went to go sit in the phone box.

I have decided I am not a very decent human being. I have probably broken Dave's bones, as well as his laughing heart. He may have to be called Dave the Broken from now on.

Jas came outside to look for me.

Very sweetly she said, "Dave may have sprained his wrist, but he'll be alright. Would you like to go home?"

I told her "I would like to go see Dave, as he is probably in agony, but you are just telling me some poo so I don't feel quite as much like crap."

She nodded wisely. She than asked what the bloody hell I was doing in the phone box. How I love mon pallie!

Jassy walked me back into the club, and pointed Dave out, he was talking to some tarty girls. I walked right up behind him and tapped on is shoulder. He turned around, and frowned at me, than completely ingorez-vous'd me!! The nervosity of that boy!

In a very fierce and demanding tone, I told Dave that I wanted to speak with him at that very moment.

He turned to me, and looked very angry. He said, "What do you want Georgia? I figured from the way you pushed me away, you didn't want anything to do with me! You're sending me mixed signals! Do you like me or not?"

At this point, there were many people listening in. But, he kept going, just like the little engine that could.

"I'm sick and tired of this, Georgia! You lead me on, than push me away! What do you want from me? Do you want me to leave you alone, is that it? Because I'll be glad, too!"

I said, "Dave, I-" But he cut me off, quite rudely.

"No, listen to me! I like you, so much Georgia. I really do, but you're to concerned about yourself and your stupid Italian boyfriend! But guess what! He's not here anymore, and I am! So why can't you just realize I'm the guy for you?"

He looked around at the gazillion people witnessing, and said "Don't you all have some dancing to do?" And with one last look at me, he walked away.

Seconds later, I was surrounded by the Ace Gang.

"Was is as bad as it sounded?" Asked Jools.

I looked at them all tearful, and Jas knew I wanted to go home.

* * *

**Mobiles Give you Cancer: So it took me long enough! I've been tres busy, and I know this chapter isn't fab, but its all I could think of! Off to go make dinner, so please review and I'll start on a new chapterrr ! XOXO**


	6. Tap Your Feet to the Music Good

**Disclaimer: **As mentioned vair , vair many times previously - I only own this plot! Not the characters, not the whole Georgia-diary idearr, just this little fanfic (:  
Oh and to all you Dave the Laugh lurverrrrrs - I OWN HIS HEART ! HA HA AND THRICE HAAAAAAAA!

**Saturday, August 6th**

**Jas' Kitchen**

**10:30 am**

Awoken at the crack of 9:00 am, to Jas' Mutti telling us her and Jas' Vati were going out, and that they left some money on the kitchen counter!! What marvy parenting! My parents would rather die than give me and my mates some cash.

Jas is making us some brekky. It smells quite delish.

**10:35 am**

This actually is quite scrumptious. I love my bestie pallie in the whole universe.

I told her, "Jas, this brekky is quite yummy scrumboes! You are quite the fab chef."

She smiled and fiddled her fringe. "So, uhm, did you want to talk about last night?"

I kept eating my brekky, "What about last night?" I'm playing it so vair, vair cool.

She huffed, "The whole Dave the Laugh fandango, don't you remember? He was shouting for all of England to hear! How could you possibly forget? You were in tears!"

"Jas?" I said.

"Yes?"

"Shut up."

**My bedroom  
2:16 pm**

Made Jas take to me town to buy me some lippy for being such a meanie before. It is 'Cream-Pop' flavoured. Like those creamy popsicle type things. Vair yummers!

Angus and Gordy have turned my room into some sort of Cat Sanctuary, while I was away. There is kitty-litter all over my bed, cat food on the floor, and a few hairballs scattered about. There is also a pair of Libby's dirty knickers on my pillow. It is quite nice to see that my Mutti made an effort to clean up (not).

**3:20 pm**

Jassy Spazzy just rang.

She said, "Gee?"

I said, "Yes, mon pallie?"

"You promised me three jammy dodgers, therefore I am coming over to pick them up, or else, we are going exploring in the forest."

I told her I was not giving her any jammy dodgers, so I am being forced to go on a ramble.

**3:26 pm**

Must find appropriate hiking ensemble.

**3:40 pm**

Have decided on my new groovy smeakers, denim mini and a tank top. And very natural makeup (eyeliner, lippy, mascara, blush, eye shadow).

**5:17 pm**

Back from hell (ie the forest). T'was vair, vair torturous. First, it was quite difficult walking in the skirt, as it was quite tight. Than, the forest was quite muddy, so my new shoes got a bit dirty.

And, if that wasn't bad enough, Jas wanted to cross this sort of river of mud, to get to the other side, so I thought I could take one quick step into the mud, and hop to the other side. So I did.

When I got to the other side, I only had one shoe on. The other bloody shoe was stuck in the mud!!

"Jas!" I said, full of anxiousnessosity. "My shoe is in the mud!"

We tried for three million hours to get my shoe out, but it sunk in deeper, and deeper until it was out of view, like some sort of out of view, viewing thing.

I walked home with only one shoe. And, when Vati saw me, he went ballisticimus!

In a very angry voice he shouted, "WHERE IN THE FRESH IS YOUR SHOE?"

In a very calm voice I said, "Vati, is has been swallowed whole my some sort of mud creek, like thing. I will need to borrow some money to buy new shoes, please and thank-you." I held out my hand waiting for money.

He laughed like some sort of beardy laughing thing. "You are not getting anything from me! You have no respect what so ever, Georgia! If you want money, than you'll have to earn it! Go get a job, I am through with this nonsense!"

**7:00 pm**

Dave the Laugh just rang. He is coming over. MUST BEAUTIFYYYYY!!

**7:56 pm**

What a pleasant visit from my groovy mate Dave!! He had a sling on his arm. I apologized for the whole couch-push-off situation, he was quite forgiving. He than apologized for yelling like a mad cattle last night, and causing me any sort of embarrassment. I was quite forgiving. We are both such forgiving forgivers.

I told him about the mud incident, and my forever lost shoe, he laughed like a maniac and said, "Never change sex-kitty!"

We sat on the wall, for a while discussing things of all different sorts. He taught me a new Dave the Laugh phrase, "Tap your feet to the music good." The nub of it, is that its used to describe something very, very, mega good. Like, "That brekky was tap your feet to the music good, Mutti" Even though, I'd never say that, as my Mutti hardly ever makes a good meal, let alone any meal.

Right before he left, he gave me a peck on the cheek and handed me a bit of folded paper. "Bye sex-kitty! Keep on groovin'!"

**Dans ma chamber**

**8:04 pm**

Have unfolded the paper from Dave. It is a little drawing of me shoving him off the couch. Hahahahaha. He is quite hysterical. I must tack this lovely illustration to my wall for eternity and beyond.

Can't find anything to tack with. I suppose I'll use some chuddie.

**8:08 pm**

There, stuck and bubbly-gum scented! I am tres brilliant!

**8:32 pm**

As expected, the gang called to make sure I was alright. I told them all was well, and Dave and I are once again pallies. They were quite satisfied, so we did a round of the Viking Bison Horn dance over the phone. Than Vati told me to get off the phone, until I had the money to pay for it. What a mean beardy man.

**Bed  
12:13 am**

Libby is asleep beside me. Scuba diving Barbie is pressed up against my leg, she has some sharp bits to her. Must get beauty sleep! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

**Sunday, August 7****th**

**Bed  
7:18 am**

At the crack of 7 am, Vati came storming into my room, and opened the curtains.

He said, "Get up, you're looking for a job today!" He tossed me the news paper, and left.

What the fresh hell?? Me with a job?! Hahahahaha, you a tres comical, Vati. Tres comical.

* * *

**Mobiles give you Cancer:** There you have it! Hopefully you thought it was atleast a little fabbity fab! I have lots o' good ideas, but I dont want to rush it! So please, review, and I'll keep on truckingggg ! XOXO LOTS O' LURVEEEE (:  
**PS:** Just like Louise Rennison, a lot of these things I'm writing are things that have happened to me. The whole shoe scenario, yes, it happened last night, I was in my school shoes, haahh just thought you'd all love to know!


	7. Two Great, Big Leaky Water Faucets

**Disclaimer:** Oh dear Gott in Himmel? A bit like a broken record, aren't we? Well, I don't own the characters, just this plot, that I'm praying to Our Lord Sandra you like.

**9:18 am**

Dressed and out of bed. Going to go ask Mutti for some cash, so I can go to clothes shopping avec the Ace Gang.

**Kitchen**

**9:23 am**

Asked Mutti. I said, "Mutti may I please have some money?"

Before she can answer, Vati said, or he actually shouted, "YOU ARE NOT GETTING ANOTHER CENT OUT OF US!!"

I said, in a very calm way, "The last time I checked, dear man, you were not my Mutti. Although, you very well could be, I have yet to forget about your apron stashed away."

With that he muttered a cuss word, and left. Mutti handed me thirty dollars, "Please be more respectful, Gee".

**Bedroom  
10:03 am**

Was dressed quite simply before, but Jas phoned to tell me the blokes were coming along, and we were shopping as well as going to the pictures. So now, I must find a whole new outfit and restart my makeup.

**11:00 am**

Dressed in a pair of denim shorts and Mutti's silvery tank. My eyes are all nice and smokey looking, and I've got my new lippy on. I look quite groovy-irresistible.

**11:23 am**

Walking with Jas. She asked about Massimo.

She said, "What about Massimo?"

So I said, "What about Massimo?"

She huffed a bit, "Well, are you two still together?"

I thought for a moment, I'm pretty sure we are still together. I think. "Of course, Jas. Dave the Laugh is just a hairpin twist in our relationship rollercoaster."

Jas blinked, "I suppose you are right. I mean, Massimo is probably all over all sorts of beautiful Italian women, so it evens out."

What a fabbity fab best pal!!

**Piddly Diddly Department  
2:36 pm**

Everyone is buying snackies, so I decided to go to the Loo. We're at the pictures, and we've just came back from our shopping extravaganza. Dave was there, looking groovy as usual. He bought me a pair of new shoes, seeing as my other shoes are lost in a muddy prison. The new shoes are quite groovy, they're sneakers, made of canvas, that, according to Dave have been around for three million years, or something. Anyways, they've got all little drawings on them, they're vair lovely.

**Home**

**6:40 pm**

The movie was quite good, it was about that card game, uhmmmmm… Black jack, I think, and Vegas. I sat between Jools and Dave. Dave kept making these funny comments during the whole show, we laughed like loons, into popcorn was pelted at us. HAHAHA.

It is quite nice being strictly mates with Dave. Even though he gives me the teensy miniscule horn.

Ugh!! The tele is ringing, so I must get it as Mutti most definitely will not.

**7:02 pm**

IT WAS MASSIMO!! THE LURVEEE GOD! THE ITALIAN STALLION!! It was so groovy hearing his wonderous, beautiful, gorgey voice!

He asked about me visiting, I told I had been trying vair, vair hard (which is a bit of a lie) to persuade my horrible Mutti and Vati, but they won't change their minds.

He said he misses me so much, but he has to go makes sausage – erlack!! Must go ask Mutti once more!

**7:06 pm**

Forget about asking Mutti, she found out I borrowed her top. She is quite angered. I told her maybe if she bought me new clothes once in a while, we wouldn't have this problem.

**Monday, August 8****th**

**5:15 pm**

Dave phoned this morning. He said we must chat. He also said, he'll be coming round tomorrow morning at eleven.

**Jassy's Boudoir with the whole gang**

**8:30 pm**

Discussing what Dave could possibly want.

Jas said, "Maybe he is going to make you choose between him and Massimo?" I shook my head no. Dave wouldn't start that business again.

Rosie suggested, "Maybe he is a homosexualist and wants you to be the first to know?" I thought for a moment, than shook my head. Dave wouldn't give up on women.

Jools thought maybe he just wanted to get a coffee and discuss life, love and everything in between. She is probably right. She is quite wise.

Even though she has a pretend unibrow stuck on her forehead.

**Tuesday, August 9****th****  
**

**In bed  
10:57 am**

Too tired to get out of bed. I will stay in here foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

**One Minute Later**

OH DEAR GOTT IN HIMMEL. SOMEONE HAS JUST KNOCKED ON THE DOOR! I HAVE COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN DAVE THE LAUGH WAS COMING OVER! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**10:59 pm**

Oh my giddygodspajamas!! I can hear him talking to Mutti, I hope she's got a bra on.

Must quickly apply makeup!!

**In my room**

**1:05 pm  
**

Sniffle, sniffle. Life is a horrible, bloody place! I hate my life! Why must everything bad happen to me?

**1:10 pm**

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?

**1:15 pm**

There is a big pile of moist tissues on the ground. But, I do not care. Life for me is over. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!

**1:20 pm**

I'm tucked in bed, my eyes are all puffy and red. I can't control my sobbing. I am never, ever, ever leaving my room again.

After I had my makeup all applied in an "I've-just-woke-up" sort of way, I went downstairs to see Dave. He was sitting at the kitchen table colouring with Libs. And guess what?! She was being a decent girl! No poo-business or anything!

"Hi, Georgia" He said, he looked a bit different. Not like Dave the Laugh. More like Dave the can't-quite-put-my-finger-on-it.

We went outside to talk. It was a pleasant morning. We walked to the park, and sat on a bench.

He looked at me, with all seriousnessosity in his eyes, "There's something I have to tell you. It's really difficult to say, especially to you, Gee. So please, don't say anything until I'm through, alright?"

I nodded. And braced myself. Maybe Ro-Ro was right! What if Dave is a homosexualist?! And he and some other bloke fall inlove?! What would I do?! My horn advisor cannot be a homosexualist! He can't be!!

He grabbed my hands, and looked me straight into the eyeballs, "I'm going to Igloo-a-go-go Land,"

I let out a sigh of relief, "Oh, thank you Sandra! I thought you were going to tell me you were a flaming homosexualist, and possibly have the horn for my Vati, or something. So what is this Igloo-a-go-go place you speak of? It sounds-"

He cut me off, "No, Georgia! I don't think you understand, I'm moving to Igloo-a-go-go Land."

My mouth drooped open, like some sort of drooping drooper. "For – for good?" I asked.

He shook his head, "My mum thinks I should spend time with my father, so..." His voice trailed off.

I continued for him, "So, it'll be for good."

He nodded sadly, "Probably, I mean, its not for sure. When five months rolls around, I'll see how much I like it there,"

And that's when my eyes turned into two great, big leaky water faucets.

He took my hand in his, and walked me home. I had lots of questions to ask him, but my mouth felt a bit dry, like an old cactus. I did manage to ask him two vair, vair important questions: Where is this Igloo-a-go-go Land, and when he leaves.

"Canada," he said, "And I leave on," He looked down at our shoes. I was wearing the shoes he had given me. "I leave on Sunday,"

Oh noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

DOUBLE POO AND MERDE!!

Canada? That frozen arctic tundra?! And SUNDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!

* * *

**Mobiles give you cancer:** shields self from angered readers I am a big huge vast DTL/Gee shipper, I would never ever do anything to tear them apart, I promise it'll all be okay, I hope ;) REVIEWWWW !


	8. That is Why I am on Permanent Bed Rest

**DISCLAIMER:** I only own this fabbity fab plot, that I hope you think is super mega marvy & double cool with knobs! Alright, alright! Don't have a nervy B! Lets get on with it!!

****

Wednesday, August 10

**Weeping in my chamber  
****7:45 am**

I have yet to sleep, eat or do anything since Dave told me the tres horrible news. The tele has been ringing off the hook, but I will not accept any calls, as I am on the rack of depression.

**Still in bed  
10:51 pm**

Jas came around. Mutti let her in. I pretended to be in a deep sleep, but I was still uncontrollably sobbing like a sobbing sobbery type thing.

"Georgia? Are you alright?" She asked very sweetly, like a proper best mate.

I sniffled, "No"

Jassy climbed into bed with me and just laid there for a bit. I didn't even bother calling her a lezzie.

After about six zillion years of lezzie-laying-downessosity, I told her everything. I told her about Igloo-a-go-go Land. Than I told her, that I am never leaving this house for all of eternity. She told me Boots was having a sale. I don't care. I am never leaving.

**Thursday, August 11****th**

**Still in bed  
12:00 pm**

Libby has brought me up a cup of tea. What a sweetheart. Of course, when the tea arrived it was empty, I assume it has poured out on the way up, as she was holding the cup upside down.

**12:45 pm**

Mutti brought up some toast.

She sat down on the end of my bed, "Gee, is something the matter?"

No, Mutti. Everything is chip dandy, with a side of pants. That is why I am on permanent bed rest, and sobbing like a lunatic.

I'm much to tired to say all of that, so I just sniffle out "Yes"

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked. I shook my head, and she nodded. "Okay, if you ever need me, you know where to find me"

She got up and left. Sometimes she is such a kind Mutti.

**1:00 pm**

Just got off the phone with Tom. I only accepted his call, because Libby came bursting into my room, with the tele and shoved it to my face.

He said, "Hi Gee. How is everything?"

I muttered "Okay,"

He clearly didn't notice how much my voice was full of sadnessosity, 'cause he said, "Oh, that's good. Anyways, Saturday night we are throwing a final hurrah for Dave, you know, before he jets off. Would you be able to make it?"

I thought for a moment, would I be able to make it? Or will I still be permanent bed rest, and still crying like Niagara Falls (which are located in Igloo-a-go-go Land).

I told him I'd think about, and hung up.

**Friday, August 12****th**

**Still in bed**

**10:15 am**

Feeling a wee bit better today.

**10:17 am**

Dave is leaving in two days.

**10:18 am**

Feeling like poo all over again.

**Saturday, August 13****th**

**Outside on the wall**

**12:20 pm**

Mutti insisted that I get out of the house. So here I am, all aloney on my owney in the great outdoors.

Gordy is looking up at me, all cross-eyedish. I may give him a swift kick. But I won't, 'cause I am hurting to much.

Dave is leaving tomorrow morning, at the crack of 8. I may never be happy again.

**12:40 pm**

The postman has just handed me a few letters. I riffled on through them, and there is a letter from Massimo!!

**12:41 pm**

I am actually not that excited, as I might've been a few days ago. Oh well, opening her up.

**12:45 pm**

Here is what it says:

_Dear Georgia,_

_Ciao bella! How are you?_

_I miss you everyday, and I cannot wait until you can come visit me, and my family!_

_They are all so excited to be seeing you!_

_I am having a great time here, but I still very much wish you were with me!_

_Please, please ask your Mother and Father again, if you can visit!_

_They are such very nice people, I am sure they will agree!_

_I have to go now, but I miss you and love you very much!_

_Xoxo_

_Massimo_

I put the letter in my pocket, and went back to my sniffling.

**2:45 pm**

Jas came by, she asked me why I haven't started my beautosity preparations yet. I told her I was not coming tonight, as I am in a state of depression.

She said, "Gee, think of Dave! Imagine how horrible he feels! He is the one leaving all of his mates, and moving to the other side of the planet! And think of how horrible he'd feel when he realizes you are not there tonight!"

**In my Bedroom**

**3:15 pm**

Jas has sat me down on a chair, and is choosing an outfit for me, against my will.

**3:17 pm**

She has chosen my newish skinny jeans, and a yellow stripey tank top.

**4:00 pm**

Jas has plucked my eyebrows, which over the last few days have grown into a very furry caterpillar.

She has also made my hair full of bouncability, and pulled my fringe back. I look quite good.

**5:15 pm**

I am now in a better mood, and getting a bit excited for tonight. But than I remember what is happening tomorrow and get down in the dumps.

**5:20 pm**

Jas has completed my makeover, and I look vair, vair groovy. My makeup is very sexy and sophisticated. Tom says to come at about a quarter to 6, so we have turned on some loud tunes, and are dancing like mad sheep.

**5:30 pm**

Walking. Jas says the party is taking place Rollo's backyard because it is quite giganticus. I have told Mutti I am spending the night at Jas' because we aren't sure at what late hour this shin-dig will end.

**6:30 pm**

I am having a groovy time. Tom went to go pick Dave up. When he arrives, I suspect I might cry like there's no tomorrow.

**6:45 pm**

Dave has arrived, and he looks utterly bewildered. He really had no idea. I may have to avoid him, unless I want to turn the faucets on. Which I do not, because a) When I sob, I SOB and b) my makeup looks vair groovy.

**7:03 pm**

Dave has spotted me! Must walk away!

**7:05 pm**

I am sitting on Rollo's front porch, and I'm beginning to tear up.

**7:06 pm**

I am still sitting on Rollo's front porch, and I'm sobbing like a mad woman. I think I should go home.

**Walking Home**

**7:30 pm**

I am vair, vair sad and heartbroken.

**Back home**

**7:35 pm**

When I came in, Mutti said, "Gee?! What're you doing home so early?"

I told her I was not in the party mood, and that I must report to my bed of pain and depression.

**In my bed of pain and depression**

**7:36 pm**

All my makeup has ran down my face, and is smeared all over my pillow. But I don't care! I don't care about anything anymore! I hope Igloo-a-go-go land is damned straight to the bowels of hell!

**One minute later**

Not literally.

**7:40 pm**

I can hear Mutti on the phone, she is telling someone to come over. I bet it's one of her sad mates. Great, that is all I need. A dozen old women doing aerobics to ABBA in my living room, while I'm in my bed of pain.

**7:50 pm**

The doorbell has rung. I can't be bothered to even looking out my door and see what sort of tragic unitards they're wearing.

**7:51 pm**

Oh dear Gott in Himmel, I hear someone trampling up the stairs! Quick! Must pretend to be asleep! (Fake) zzzzzzzzzzz...

**Two seconds later**

Under the sheeties of pain. Someone is knocking on the door. Oh, our Lord Sandra, the doorknob is being twisted.

**One second later**

Mutti is sitting on the edge of my bed. I think it is her, I have not surfaced from my fabric-y prison yet.

"Gee?"

Oh my giddygodsunionkjackundercrackers! That is not Mutti! It's Dave!! Dave the bloody Laugh! Sitting on my bed! Whilst there is a party going on for him!!

I make a "Zzzz" sound.

"I know you aren't sleeping kitty-cat, I can see your hand moving under the sheets, smart one."

Dammit. I'm going up.

**3:30 am**

I am a wreck. I am an abso-bloody-lutely wreck. Dave has just left my house. I don't think I will ever stop crying. I will be like that girl, who follows the rabbit, and cries until the whole room is flooded. But I don't think I will have a sudden growth spurt, though.

Anyways, after I surfaced from underneath my sheets, and gasped for air, for a good solid moment, Dave looked at me all sad.

"Why did you leave?" he asked.

I looked down at my hands, who were fiddling around in my lap, "I was a bit sad, you see…"

He put his hand on my leg (I really can't believe Mutti let us stay alone up here!) "I'm going to miss you so much, Sex-kitty. You have no idea."

I laughed and sniffled at the same time, "I have been crying like the Niagara falls, for the past millions of days. I think I have a bit of an idea."

He looked even sadder. "I never thought this would hurt you so much, I'm so sorry."

And than I cried a bit, than he cried a bit. I let him come under my sheeties, and we just laid there, looking up at all the cobby-webs on my ceiling.

"I love you, Georgia" he whispered.

If I was standing up, I would have fallen to the ground. Because, at that very moment, for the first time ever, with Dave the laugh, I went jelloid.

* * *

**Mobiles give you cancer: **I don't know about you, But if I hadn't written this, I may be on the verge of tearing up. Please review!! I know there are people reading, and not reviewing, so pleeeeeeease review! I lurvee getting the little emails from fanfic! Anyways, hopefully you enjoyed reading this as much as I e joyed writing it! Stay tuned for a new chappie!


	9. Mouldy Pillows

**DISCLAIMAAAA:** I own this plottish type-thing, and Dave's heart. And he owns my heart. So ha.

**4:00 am**

In exactly four hours, Dave the Laugh will be getting on a plane to leave for Igloo-a-go-go Land. Dave the Laugh, who said he lurves me. Dave the Laugh, who has finally made my legs go jelloid. Dave the Laugh, who I am pretty much inlurve with.

He gave me a number to ring him up on. He said I can ring everyday, if I like. I think I will.

**4:14 am**

Perhaps I will go to the airport at 7:58, and just as Dave is about to board, I will run to him, and tell him I love him, very much so, and snog him for six million hours, and than he'll miss his flight, and stay here forever. And we can finally love freely. No Masimo, no Emma, no redbottomosity, nothing! Just be and Dave forever and ever, until eternity, and ever eternity, and zzzzzzz….

**9:17 am**

OOOOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I have slept in! Dave is probably on the plane now, thinking of beavers and moose, and maple syrup.

**Kitchen  
9:30 am**

I am only eating, because Dave would want me to. And I am also vair hungry. Mutti came in, and said she found this in the mailbox. It was an envelope addressed to moi! I opened it up, and enter waterworks, stage right!

_Dear Georgia,_

_By the time you read this, I may very well be on the plane to Igloo-a-go-go. Please don't be sad, Sex Kitty. Y'know when you cry, your eyes go all smallish like mice eyes, and your conk looks twice as big. And red. And no one wants that. _

_On the brighter side of the fridge, I am looking forward to seeing my dad, and there are all certain things in Canada, I hear. It's not all beavers and ice, apparently._

_And, don't you dare think I will ever, ever, EVER forget about you. You are the grooviest person I have ever snogged, and you have amazing nungas. Remember to call, and to stay out of trouble._

_Give Masimo a nice big, wet snog for me!_

_I love you, Sex Kitty,_

_Love always, Dave xxx_

**Back in Misery headquarters (My bed)**

**10:00 am**

Oh why did he have to goooooooooo? My pillow is all wet, and may possibly grow mould now. And I will become poisoned, and die all aloney. And my tombstone will say "Died from her own mouldy pillow… With a broken heart". Or something. I am much too sad to think of anything else.

**10:10 am**

GADZOOKS AND LACKDAY. I AM HUGGING MY MUTTI AND KISSING MY VATI'S BEARDY FACE.

As I was lying in my bed of misery, awaiting the mould of my damp pillow to take my life, there was a knock on the door. Being too sad and too lazy to tell whoever it was to leave me alone, I said "Enter", in a really sad voice, which I imagine sounds like the voice of a very sad woman who has just lost her lover in the Great War.

Mutti and Vati came in, all smiley-smiley. Could they not see their daughter was in AGONY?! Than they started giggling, like two school girlies.

Mutti said "Gee, we know you've been really, really upset."

Oh really? Because it seems like you both are completely oblivious to the fact I have been in bloody bed forever, crying out my soul.

Vati than said, "And we hate to see you like this, so your Mother and I have been talking, and decided to do something about it."

I felt like shouting, "GET TO THE POINT, OLD BEARDY ONE" but I must save my energy.

Mutti continued on (I swear, they must've practised this before coming up!) "So, we'd like to give you this," And she handed me a white envelope.

I took it cautiously, because you never know with Mutti. It could've been a list of chores for me to do.

I opened it up, AND NEARLY HAD A NERVY B!!

Inside was a ticket to PIZZA-A-GO-GO LAND!! Me! Going off to visit my Italian lurve God. With no parental supervision, just me and my Italian Stallion.

**10:20 am**

After the hug-kiss fandango (I thought Vati's beard would fall off in shock) I realized something. I do not WANT to go to Pizza-a-go-go. I do not WANT to see Masimo. I do not WANT to date Masimo.

**In the front room**

**11:00 am**

Mutti came and sit next to me.

"I thought you would've been happier, love. You've been bothering me non-stop about Italy, I would've-"

I said "Will you be able to return the ticket?"

She looked shocked. Which is understandable, "Why? Did something happen with you and the Italian Stallion?"

Than I found myself crying like billio, and telling her everything. I told her about Dave and all our secret snogs, and how he thinks Masimo is a homosexualist, and how Igloo-a-go-go is more than beavers and snow. I think she got quite overwhelmed, because she got up and made us milky-pops drink.

**11:15 am**

Back in Cry City. Mutti said she can return the ticket, if I am really sure. I told her yes. And cried some more.

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**Mobiles Give You Cancer: AND I'M BAAAAACK. I know this chapter was absolute BOLLOCKS and vair short, but I haven't written in a long long long time, and wanted to let y'all know I'm still alive. Also, I KNOW in previous chapters I've user Hamburgerese (Dollars, cents, etc) And I'm sorry. I just forget about currency whilst I've got DAVE on the mind. So review your bumoleys off, and I'll whip up a BETTER CHAPTERRR :D xxxoooo**


	10. To the Stars and Back

**Disclaimer:** Forsooth and Lack a day! I don't own any characters, all I own is thi simple fanfic, that people seem to like!**

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**Sunday, August 14**

**th**

**10:00 am**

Dave will be in Igloo-a-go-go Land right now. Frolicking amongst Eskimos and beavers. And moose's. Maybe he will meet a Moose, named Mary-Anne, who only says "Eh?" That would be tragic.

**Two minutes later**

Angus and Gordy have joined me. Gordy is right beside my head, licking his bumoley! Erlack!!

**In the Kitchen**

**12:15 pm**

I came down stairs and THERE WAS ACTUALLY A BIT OF LUNCH SET UP FOR ME!! Am I in the right house?

Mutti made me a sandwich with the crusts cut off! Hurrah!

**12:20 pm**

Things are getting suspicious. She has cut up some apple for me. I hope she isn't running away with a man named Armistead. Unless he is rich. And they take me of course.

**Outside**

**1:30 pm**

I was casually sitting outside on the way, when Emma walked by. Her eyes were all red and puffy. When she saw me, she tried to smile, but she continued sobbing like Sally Sobber.

I wondered what on earth she was sobbing about. So I said, "Emma, what on earth are you sobbing about?"

After about seven zillion years of sniffling, she said, "I miss Dave."

Oh toot in a biscuit! I forgot she was his PROPER girlfriend.

I said, "Oh, well, he'll come back for visits, and you can ring him up, and maybe you can go and visit him." Wow. I am so vair wise.

She sniffled some more, "What if he meets someone new?"

I told her all Igloo-a-go-go Land has is beavers, moose's, snow and Eskimos. There are no people there, except for Dave's father.

She than said, "What mark did you get in Geoggers?"

I told her that was irrelevant; because it is a known fact the Canada only has beavers, moose's, snow and Eskimos.

**3:00 pm**

Ace Gang meeting in half an hour at Ro-Ro's. It better not have anything to do with her wedding in a thousand years time.

**Back home  
5:00 pm**

The meeting DID regard her wedding. I sort of ignorez-voused the whole thing, as I had more important thing-a-ma-gigs on my mind. Like what Dave was up to. And how many beavers has he seen.

Finally, I had a minute to speak (Actually, Ellen started rambling on about Declan and whether or not he "erm, is her, uhm, proper, y'know, uhm, boyfriend-type thing, uhhh.." so I cut her off) I said "Mutti and Vati bought me a ticket to Pizza-a-go-go Land"

They were all quite literally shocked. Jas stopped flicking her fringe, and looked at me, with an open mouth. "Really?! When are you going?!"

I told them, I had told Mutti to return the ticket as I no longer wanted to go. They stared. Like staring things.

Mabs said, "Why?! Masimo is so fit! You'd be all aloney with him!"

I girded my loins, and told them. "I am not going because I no longer lurve Masimo."

They all looked shocked. Honestly, you'd think that they thought I was obsessed with him.

I continued on, "Because I lurve Dave the Laugh. And that is le fact!"

Jools smiled a bit scarily. And Mabs said, "It's about time!"

I was confused so I said, "What d'you mean?!"

Mabs picked up Rosie's faux-beard off the floor and stuck it on herself. "Well, you see, Dave doesn't mind that you are mad as a hatter. He also quite enjoys your large conk, and your voluptuous nungas. In essence, he is the perfect bloke for you."

Jools added, "And he's also well fit,"

Than, came in Ellen, "Erm, yeah. I mean, uh, you two, are, uhm, you know, like, erm, good for each other, because, well, I reckon, uhm, you're both, you know, quite a, like, you know, like a laugh. Right?"

"Typical you, though" Jas said, "Realizing you actually do lurve him, right before he leaves for Canada. You always want what you know you won't get, Gee."

I gave her the evils.

**7:45 pm**

The phone rang, so I naturally had to answer. "Oh, you two just stay where you are. I'll get the telephone, don't even worry about my broken heart." Than I remembered Mutti and Vati had gone out.

I picked up the phone, "Centre for the broken-hearted, how may I help you?"

"Ay, what colour knickers have you got on?"

OHHHHHHHH JOY ABOUND! DAVE THE LAUGH WAS CALLING MEEEEEEEE!

"Dave! How are things? Have you met Mary-Anne the moose? Are you wearing a parka to protect yourself from the bitter cold?"

He laughed. Oh, How I miss him! "Actually, Sex Kitty, it's vair sunny and warm here. I'm sitting outside in the yard, working on my tan. And, no. I have yet to meet any moose's."

I laughed, and told him about Emma's puffy eyes, and her sobbing like Sally Sobber. He felt quite bad about that. He than asked how I was, and if I missed him a lot.

I said, "Well, yes. I miss you to the stars and back."

And he said, "I wish I could snog you right now."

Cheeky minx!

He than said he had to go, but for me to call him whenever I get lonely.

"I love you, Sex Kitty. You know, I do."

And, I, very intelligently, said "Yes, well, I, erm, love you, too, type thingy."

He laughed, in a very Dave the Laugh type way, and we hung up.

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**MOBILES GIVE YOU CANCER: I've decided that this IS the last chapter. I am going to start on a new fanfic, that is set after Stop in the name of pants! so add me to your author alert list. Thank you vair much for reading&reviewing this fanfic, I'm glad you guys enjoyed it! I'm going to start my new one today, and hopefully have the first two chapters up by this evening. Thanks guys!! XOXOXOOX**


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